Peace can’t be found in chaos.
By Timi Olaitan
We often underestimate the importance of where we ground ourselves. Where we call home, the job we suffer to work at and the relationships we culminate along the way. Finding a good place to grow from isn’t as easy as we’d like it to be.
The aesthetic said yes but your mental health said no.
The constant reference the Bible makes to plants, trees and gardening generally has admittedly become a new obsession of mine. Before buying a plant or seeds you have to research what environment they prefer to live in. I have a sansevieria plant who is happy to be watered once a month, but my aloe plant cries every 2 weeks from thirst.
We are quick to expose ourselves to new environments, but never quick enough to ask ourselves if the environment actually works for us. I can’t count the number of times I’ve been in a place and thought to myself “this is the last time I’m coming here”. Knowing what atmosphere works for you and contributes to the curation of peace in your life is a crucial step we often overlook for reasons which, to be honest are understandable. Who has the time to determine if that accom is good for you when getting one is on a first come first serve basis? Where’s the time to consider if that new job has a healthy work environment when this is the first call back you’ve received this month? Why would you question the intentions of the first friend you’ve made when you’ve not made many? Jesus said the peace He gives is not the same as the one the world gives. Asking and believing in the peace He has promised is one way to find inner and outer peace. Getting to know yourself with God in mind is another way. But how do you get to know yourself? Honestly the answer is so vague and Tumblr-hungry but the tumblr girlies had some points. Become introspective, make note of every feeling you have when reacting to something, and challenge yourself to know why you think that way.
I like to sit in silence. No lights, no notifications, just dead silence. Meditation is the cute word for it, because sitting silently sounds so funny (not funny haha). Nonetheless, it challenges my mind because at first it feels uncomfortable, but then my mind opens up and starts working purely from inspiration within. Nothing is around to distract me, so every thought I have while sat in silence is in essence who I am at the core. You can talk to yourself out loud in your room if silence isn’t your thing. Verbally pull out the inner you that is hiding behind the distractions of social media discourse. Date yourself. Take yourself out to eat, buy yourself some perfume, or flowers, speak affirmations to yourself while looking in the mirror. Woo the inner you, she’s in there somewhere.
And it’s never too late to start over if after learning who you are, you realise the environment you’re accustomed to isn’t where peace can reside. Over the summer, I left my aloe plant outside for way too long and the poor thing *appeared* dead. I was so close to throwing it away, but my mum urged me to try and bring it back to life. I brought it back inside, sat it on the window sill and pruned it for a few weeks. Lo and behold she is alive! Lol. In becoming self-aware, you may realise you’ve been in the wrong place all along, and can start to beat yourself up for it by looking back and cringing at some of the decisions you made for yourself, without even knowing who you are. But it can be revived. It’s never too late for do-overs. You go again, but this time with the knowledge you’ve gained from the mistakes you’ve made. My plant also taught me not every situation is irreconcilable. If you can change the dynamic of wherever you are to suit you, do that too. Make your standards known, or find a healthy compromise and if neither work, at least you’ll know you did what you could to save it, pack your things and run.
The journey to the land of inner and outer peace isn’t one to do alone. It lives for mistakes, adventure, conflict, and love, so don’t let it stop you from doing life. In fact, it encourages you to enjoy every second of it! Do not be worried and upset, and do not be afraid.
Yours truly
Timi.
